Ditch the Dad's Day gifts!

I love my dad. Very much. Which is why I'm not getting him anything for Father's Day this year. Nope. Nada. Nothing upscale and no gag gifts -- not even a novelty singing fish. 

And we're not at odds -- in fact, we've never been closer.

It's just that physical things have lost their meaning as our family faces an extremely wrenching impending loss.

And it's made me realize that time and shared experiences are truly the only things that matter.

So I'll be traveling to see him and spending the weekend whatever way he chooses.

He's told me he actually doesn't want to do anything special (he's already pretty active, playing tennis and golf regularly, even though he's in his 80s).

"Let's just hang out," he said. And over the past year, our just spending time together has been some of the richest experiences I've had.

A classic distant dad while I was growing up (he was simply out earning the bucks to support our small brood), he's now become my confident.

Someone who now immediately understands the nuances of my life in a way I never dreamed would be possible.

Not that he didn't care -- I've always felt that. And even my friends would tell me how easily they could connect with my dad and feel comforted after asking him for advice.  

And how much they believe what a deep, down good person he is.

So do I.

In addition to inheriting a love of ice cream and popcorn from him (hey, I could live on these alone!), he also instilled in me a strong belief in loyalty, integrity, standing my ground -- and always looking for the good in others.

He also bought me my first catcher's mitt, taught me to play tennis, started me on the path to career success by agreeing to pay me to pull dandelions from our yard when I was 8 (the fee negotiations were fierce, but we finally struck a win-win deal).

His confidence in me becoming anything I wanted to be has helped me remain optimistic today, despite adversity I never anticipated.

But that's something he also taught me: reslience and perseverence. two things he's continuing to role model, despite some staggeringly difficult times.

So, I won't be helping to stimulate the economy by buying goofy gifts.

But I'll be treasuring the one-on-one time with my dad -- probably talking while munching a popcorn dinner, then sharing ice cream for dessert.